My husband said he hates me reddit

My husband said he hates me reddit. I have been with my husband since I was 17 years old. We become overwhelmed with emotion which makes thinking clearly even harder. We're now contemplating divorce. Constant Criticism and Negativity. This is weird to write. This has been on and off for the last few years now, and particularly when she has some challenge in her life. Boyfriend (24) says he hates me (20) My boyfriend (24) and i (20) have been in a r/s for slightly more than 3years. He does not keep it hidden and up until now I have always respected his If he can take it and visit another therapist and tell them about it. ADMIN. So you can't be surprised if he still treats you poorly afterwards. This is my opinion and it may not be a popular one. No matter what you do, it's not only not going to be good enough; it will be seen as a malicious attack on her. And anyone who makes excuses for you can join you out in the cold. Calls me names, pushes me hard, tells me how I’m stupid and retarded all the time. Compromise seems to be lost in this mix. When he came to Russia to meet my Brother in person after two years of talking online, we instantly began dating. My husband says he does “98% of everything” around our house. I feel ashamed as my disability is not physical but has a profound impact on my life. Original - 14th February 2024. At the worst of it, I fell into such a dark depression I loaded my hand gun and put it in my mouth. Not because I'm a bad conversationalist, according to him, but because he can't stand talking with me knowing I'm embarrassed to have dated him and doesn't know why I'm with him again. I got extremely upset and started yelling and I said that "I wish I would've known this is how you felt before I got pregnant with your baby. I heard my son playing and stopped. That was the first time he said he hated the baby and how the baby ruined his life. My husband and I (SAHM) are in our late 30s and have been married for a long time. Ongoing as per OOP. We emotionally abused each other. That makes it hard. my feelings" and leave it at that, or do not respond at all. Work that out with him as amiably as possible, and do so from a selfless mindset. You should've considered this before marrying Dave. my 8 year old says he hates me about 100 times a week, coz I’m the bad cop in our family. OppositePumpkin2750. My boyfriend is good to me (most times) and he wants to live with me but not my taste in music XD. On the way there I told him that one of the couples that would be there were coworkers of mine and to keep his conversations PG-13 around them. (For context, Im bigger than average. He will ask if the kids ate their lunch or behaved and such but he doesn't talk to me any more than absolutely necessary. One more word along these lines - “jokes” or not - and you are not welcome back in my home. I had never experienced feelings of lust for anyone else other than my husband, yet still feel so strongly in love for my husband. A few hours ago I was lying in bed feeding our baby. I haven’t had any romantic contact with a woman since I started dating him but that all changed a few weeks ago. If he can't/therapist says you're fine/your family is abusive - run! I say it because if you really have mental issues running with baby alone with no support from others may end bad. ) "When you tell me you hate me, I feel (sad, lonely, like I've failed as a mother)--whatever you need to say. " There was a moment of silence before he started crying and he left for the night to stay at his mothers house. He says he thinks about me dying and being replaced. Compared to ANYONE. It’s a sign that, despite the issues in your relationship, the foundation of love is still there, albeit scarred and wounded. I genuinely think my husband hates me. It makes me very sad. An important distinction to make: Your husband hates pious, hypocritical, religious people and not really religion. TLDR: husband and I had a rough patch and he wrote in his journal that he hates me and hopes I die. We have an 8 year old son together. Only this time, my husband says he hates me. When he comes home he hates that he has to be "trapped" in one area of our house. My husband has kept a semi -regular journal throughout our 4 year relationship. May 13, 2023 · 2. I talked him down and he's still angry with me. " That's Counseling 101: "When you (fill in the blank), I (fill in the blank. He'll have to be honest about his feelings and/or apologize if he wants to get what he asked for. If we did get intimate, it was the product of days of asking and nothing major. Then I started to rally work on myself. I thought that he was an open person, willing to discuss almost everything so this is very shocking to me. I’ve always been more reserved and self conscious about my body all my life. He keeps saying That's not how my mom did it. But you should probably leave because a relationship like just isn't healthy. I feel as if he is absent and uninvolved (doesn't come to appointments, doesn't seem to be concerned about baby and my health which has taken turn for the worst since I got pregnant) and when I express that I feel as if he doesn't really want to be a dad or with me ADMIN MOD. Because the fact is he loves me and isn’t cheating and yes, that’s a given. Talk to her about it and see what she says. We're now contemplating divorce : r/relationship_advice. I guess the only quick advice I can offer is to use "I statements. I want my own privacy and to do what I want in my own home. he is hot tempered and so am i a few months ago he said he had enough and Your husband is an immature , mean , insecure clown that is emotionally abusive towards you. My husband called me fat. Not the A-hole. He keeps saying I am blaming everyone for our failed marriage. She grabbed my present, opened it up, and broke the doll into pieces before throwing it in the bin and said it was the worst present ever and made me cry. Some people blame others for their depression. My husband (46, M) of almost 3 years (5 year relationship in total) doesn't touch me (27,F) or talk to me anymore. Throwaway for obvious reasons. I tried to tell him just to wait a He didn’t cheat, but his friendship with her makes me uncomfortable. I’m torn because I don’t think I can move on from what she said. Please leave, you will deeply regret staying with someone so insecure and vapid. I am 30 years old, and have been unemployed living on disability for ten years. (SORRY IN ADVANCE FOR LONG POST) Hi everyone, so I am a 19F and my boyfriend is a 21M. He refuses to get off his phone when we’re together. Posts are moderated for respect, equanimity, grace, and relevance. I can’t have children of my own and it hurts that I feel like he tries to drive me away. My (25F) boyfriend (26M) resents me in ways I don’t know how to fix or move forward from. 2-possibly social stigma. I’m so damn proud of him too for recognizing he hated his old job and making the leap to the new one. He said this to me 2 days after I’d deep cleaned the house while he was out all day with his friends. His ex-wife dragged him through a two year long contentious divorce and got the house, pretty much everything . He's extremely angsty and doesn't smile. But her boyfriend needs to decide what he wants: an equal and respectful relationship ThrowraDrink5615. Leave before it becomes dangerous to do so. When I’ve tried the approach of “this makes me feel” he’s told me that it’s on me in how I’m perceiving things. I wonder how many times this year my husband will scream he hates me in my face? Today, he hates me because I asked him to help tidy up the kitchen so I could get a roast in the crock pot. For better or for worse, he's his son and your step son. My husband doesn’t like me, but he won’t admit it. If I’m honest I don’t know. Willow said "well no one told you to cheat with my ex-husband and break up the family. My stepdaughter (19), we'll call her E, met me when she was 12 months. we had our ups and downs like any other relationship but there was a problem, i had a bad attitude problem and tend to hurt him with my words. My husband has told me, probably once a year since we got together 6 years agi that he is so dissatisfied to the point of leaving because of incompatibility. That he is sharing his unfiltered views about your family with you is a little weird to me. When someone tells us they hate us it’s easy for our minds go into panic mode and jump straight towards thoughts like “this is over” or “he doesn’t love me anymore”. Dec 1, 2023 · If your husband says he hates you but also says he loves you, it’s important to recognize that these conflicting feelings can coexist. He said he’s done with me and can’t stand being around me… but the day before he was literally My husband seems to hate me. I (27f) overheard my husband of three years (27m) talking with his ex (27m) outside our house the other night. This will be long and I am sorry. We are a welcoming subreddit and support the rights of all genders. Big-Election-4764. shit and it ruined my life for a long time. I mean when I lean against him he accepts it but well that’s the best I can get. My husband (30) and I (26) got married about six months ago and have been together 3 years now. Although he is somewhat popular and has a lot of friends, his statements indicate that he hates humans, like as a kind. he’s abusive to me. 1. He also doesn't cook. What is crazy is that just in October, we were talking about having another baby and buying a new house. Therapy does not help someone that does not want to put in the work and blames others. MembersOnline. My husband hates me and I don’t know why. 1 update - Short. The fact that he’s not willing to got to MC tells me he’s checked out. Apparently his mom really screwed him up and he's never been very warm around women in general. You have to figure out what you did that made him hate you, then stop doing that or apologize if it can’t be undone. The part where he says he hates me was written as a love letter to her. When he says mean things, you can either say "that hurt. Just know that this is not what happens in a healthy relationship. There is nothing more stressful than a lack of harmony in a family. We started dating when I was pretty young so I mean I kinda grew up with him and he's seen me change in many ways. I’m completely broken at this point. You married him knowing full well how his son treats you. He hasn't been back yet and my MIL and SIL have called me berating me and saying I broke Jakes heart with what I said and I need to apologize Tell him people he says he hates don't like interacting with him. ”. My (f 25) husband (m 28) said something disgusting to me. He wanted me to take all the photos of him on my account down, but I refused. Relationships. He speaks to me only when necessary. I also wrote a very open and honest post on reddit of my feelings at the time. He sleeps on the couch now and I'm alone in A place for sharing the for-better and for-worse of marriage. My boyfriend is the most loving, passionate and caring man I have ever met; we are both Christians and I get along with his family well. Someone else's opinion of you doesn't define you. Our relationship is beyond messy. Acknowledge the pain and hurt that NikkiNiteGamer. My ex-husband and I were married for 7 years when we divorced 2 years ago. I would suggest trying to talk to him about it. He doesn't hate you, he hates that he got caught and it's easier for him to blame you than acknowledge he's a piece of shit. I considered myself lesbian. Last week my husband admitted that he doesn't like our kids, and in fact he hates them. In fact, since he is not paying for anything, his opinion on any of them are frankly just his business. I’m an XL sometimes XXL in Tshirts etc) But He usually always reassures me that I’m beautiful My husband [30/M] told me he hates me [30/F] after 2 years of marriage. I had a sit down with them. Cuddles or kisses ? Nope. My husband doesn’t like me. You need to focus on making sure whatever happens next happens smoothly, with as little problems as possible. Doesn't sound like your husband 'hates' you. When that doesn’t work he is going to start keeping you from friends, pushing My husband (33M) is always saying how trapped he feels. Now, that being said, I am not working because my son deserves a stay at home parent. My mind is so overwhelmed right now. I completely understand that he hates me and wants nothing to do with me, I just wish we My wife and I have both said that to the other at some point and we both regretted it immediately after. People don’t like change and you have been part of each other’s lives a long time. If you did something that was absolutely astonishing He doesn’t take me with him anymore, when he visit others and if I ask him if he want to do something with me he says no or when he says yes it’s never happening. However, I am actively trying to fix that. We've always lived far away from his long-time best friend but met him and his husband a hand-full of times. Yet, at the same time, appears to be putting equal effort into being pleasant with her dad. These feelings for another made me confused! During the argument my husband says he hates me, doesn’t like the way I look (at home I want to relax so I will usually wear a sweater/crewneck and leggings, but have separate wardrobe aside for work and going out), and doesn’t like the way I smell (often time he says my breath smells, and sometimes my scalp smells even though shower daily). In college I worked my ass off in therapy and I felt like I was getting better. [new] Me (27F) and my husband (30M) have been together for almost 5 years. He was a good husband and father but I was unfaithful and he filed for divorce. I took only a handful down but left our wedding ones up in the end to keep my relationship. AITA for wanting to cut my husband’s whole family off. We have two children, a 15 month old and a 2 year old. My marriage is on the rocks right now. Makes me feel SO good about myself. Spoke with more respect and calm. This situation calls for a delicate approach. I have zero problems with his other sons. 11M subscribers in the relationship_advice community. I just try to approach him at a later time or he won’t talk Exhausted I leaned on my husband, and he was still not excited. Try not to feed into outbursts. Samantha-Burgundy. it just kept escalating and eventually he told me he hates me, he hopes a man kills me, that I’m a bitch, how I’m nothing to him and cancer, and how I can go to a homeless shelter. •. hard to give advice with knowing what. In fact, he always complimented me and what I do for him. We had almost no intimacy in our relationship. When something is said during a fight or while some is drunk it is usually the truth or at least they start to believe in. Like most couples, we have had a good deal of My husband says he doesn't love me. What it boils down to is what we believe we are to do with this belief. I know we all sometimes think this way, but he is drastic. My boyfriend and I have been together for like 4 years. Until he gets his depression, and the blame-shifting, out of the way, he's going to put his mental problems on you. We thought that over time, his kids would be more ADMIN MOD. He (the ex) had stopped by to return something to my husband, and during the exchange, the two had a brief, but quietly intense conversation. Wondering if this could just be healthy venting, or if not, what steps I should take to protect me and my baby. We have two kids together 5, m and 10 months, m. I 28F married my 37M husband 4 years ago when his daughter was 11. We got together while he was still married to their mother and his kids found out. I'm honestly having a hard time processing what happened last night and I don't know what to do. My husband never said anything mean to me before. He's trying to pin it off on me by claiming that I pressured him into it which is clearly 1- comfort. I love him so much, he’s so good to me. I hate I am resigned at this point. ADMIN MOD. We have been dating for exactly a year now, and we honestly have a very good relationship. Listener Write In. Husband hates the groceries I buy. If you feel comfortable confronting him, do so. He was lashing out because you forced him to face consequences for his actions. We have two small children at home (ages 3 and 4). Her parents'relationship was well over before I met her, and was never a "wish my parents would get back together" thing. We have been together 7 months. My husband was begging me to come do something with him. I do all of the grocery shopping and have for years. He resents we watch kids programs or that he can't just unwind after work. He said he thinks about me dying and being replaced. You might experience name-calling, blame-shifting for problems, or general negative attitudes from him. Keep a little journal and over the course of a week or two write down every time he blows off your feelings. groceryadvice. The part of the journal where he says he hates me was written as a love letter to her. Seek support from your family, friends, a therapist, or whoever is safe for you. My daughter (17) seems to hate me with every fibre of her body a lot of the time. My husband cheated on my and now I'm going to kill myself. My husband and I have been together 8 years. We have quite a few of that type. We've been together for 2 years, recently married. He does not keep it hidden and up until now I have always respected his privacy. (When he gets around another man that I knew was going to be there they Every step of the way he is standing over top me telling me I am doing it wrong and you should just throw them out because bisquits are bad for you anyway . He needs to know you see it, you’re not ashamed to admit you’re being bullied to others (bullies rely on your silence), and there will be consequences. 4. We've been married for almost 3 years and together for 5. Whoops! Won’t make that mistake again! 😅 In all seriousness, I should’ve known better than to even ask. A place for sharing the for-better and for-worse of marriage. Very often he gets very angry, says he wants to break up, then calms down. He has no accountability, no warmth and no self-confidence. Husband said he doesn't like me when I'm happy. But I don’t want to end a relationship of 3 years early if there’s a chance we can save it. I'm 29f and he is 22m. We have a baby girl on the way and ever since we have been fighting non stop. But I still told him when he hurt my feelings and I'd ask him to But regardless, you can't make someone choose between their son and someone else. Your husband is still going to be in your life, albeit in a limited capacity as a co-parent. Also very telling of a narcissist. My dad treated me like. Honey if he calls u ugly say it back to him who does he think he is at the end of the day don’t ever let anyone have so much control over who you are that a simple word from them and keep you over thinking. My husband shoved me during an argument. Her parents were never married, and her mother (we'll call her P) is bipolar and a narcissist. He says he likes and loves me, but I can’t find a single shred of evidence for this in his behavior. My (25f) husband (25m) has been acting out and being an inconsiderate jerk for the last 18 months. My boyfriend’s family hates me. :/ i just pushed my head onto his shoulders and rubbed his belly I [33f] read my husband’s [37m] journal and in it he says that he hates me and hopes I die. Every time I order groceries, I ask my husband what he wants and nearly every single time he tells me he Most likely true as he is really good at what he does. He's furious. My step daughter said she hates me so I’m not bringing her on my trip. I met my husband 3 years ago and married him last October. Fits the diagnosis. Jan 26, 2023 · Understand Why He Said What He Said. He tells me every single day that he hates me, how he wishes I would be gone, etc. Get over it. 2. He initially stayed quiet and calm but let me know he wanted a divorce but after begging and begging we ended up going to counselling. There is an update at the bottom. Be the bigger person and either accept him as is or find another path for yourself. He has been throwing the word divorce around like candy being thrown at a parade for a bit. He hates my music. First off the fact that you consider yourself 2nd place is a problem. He said he wants to still be there for his son; make sure he can. No, you're not the JustNo. He doesn’t need to defend Geeze, he said some pretty brutal shiz. My husband and I have been together for 5 years, married for 2. I’ve had serious self esteem, anger and control issues, he has had some substance issues among other things. My SO says it’s not true. This last year was horrible. I don’t know anything about the situation, but if he’s actually (and I mean honestly) hates you ONLY because you broke up with him: you probably just need to wait it out. My mind is falling apart and everyday my thoughts getting darker. I asked him if he would like to try out open relationship and he said just no. It sounds like he wants to stay with her far into the future (he says he doesn't want to get legally married, but it's obvious he wants to be married in everything but name), but he also hasn't let go of his desire to punish her for the terrible thing she did. I'm pretty sure that was the moment my heart broke into a million pieces. we were talking about people in our lives and why their relationships worked or didn't work and the topic of cheating came up because we have mutual friends who've ended relationships due to cheating and that's when he told me that he would leave me if he ever found out i cheated. He said I need to let go of the past because that's not him and that I should find someone Don't take what he says to heart. I don't know what else their is to say. Doesn’t take my feelings personally. I'm a huge fuck-up. My wife hates being the bread winner. I hate not being the bread winner. It's your ex. I've been with my husband for 5 years- My step-kids hatred is of our own doing. We had an argument last night, one of the first arguments we have ever had that was this heated. It is horrible that your husband is putting a wedge between you and your mother I feel sorry for both of you. /r/all. My (34f) ex-husband (36m) hates me. He treats me with the utmost and respect and kindness; he is a gentleman in every way. Before I met my husband, I exclusively dated/messed around with girls. Vent/Rant/FML. Finally realized my husband just doesn’t like me that much. I (35F) married my husband (56 M) 5 years ago and his family has been awful to me and our son (7M) because I was the other woman. He's trying to pin it off on me by claiming that I pressured him into it which is clearly He listens and says “Awwe! I’m sorry you were feeling that way! Thanks for telling me how you were feeling instead of holding it in!” Stuff like that. My BIL is like that, so I'm familiar with the behavior. When we did have sex, it was three My boyfriend hates me. Update - 15th February 2024. That being said, every time he’s got something new to share or is scared at Halloween or something, he’ll automatically come to me first. He settled for me. He knows I have body issues. I [33f] read my husband’s [37m] journal and in it he says that he hates me and hopes I die. It may very well be something that is entirely fixable between the two of you with intense communication and hard work on both sides. Welcome to TwoXChromosomes, a subreddit for both serious and silly content, and intended for women's perspectives. i asked him to get out but he says he has to help me. Throughout my pregnancy and since I’ve given birth he’s been doing drugs, leaving me at home with the kids for days without saying anything, gambling He took it as me ignoring his feelings and when I felt crushed and said "leave me alone" he flipped out on me, said he hated me, said our relationship wa never going to get better and said he didn't want to be with me. I couldn't hear what they were saying, but as the ex was Your family's work, their incomes, diets and spending habits do not have to determine your husband's relationship with them. I asked him why is that and he replied that 'I don't want it, end of discussion. Your MIL sees everything that you do or don't do ( and by extension, your family too) as a deliberate personal attack on her. You are his obvious target. Within minutes of realising what mistake I had done I ordered a taxi home and confessed to my husband, crying, feeling incredible regret and literally hating myself for it. So as I always do, I tell him he should do what he feels is best and leave. I met my husband four years ago and he is greatest thing that's ever happened to me. My dad says he hates me, I am not able to move away from him. About a month in we got in a fight because he was cursing and being rougher than I thought he should be. My (44f) husband (44m) and I went to a party. It will escalate because he has already verbally abused you and you take it and stay and “fall in line” to not disappoint him. If he truly hates you, find out why he feels that way. This is the first and only serious straight relationship I’ve been in my whole life. I have heard him talk about me as he doesn’t know how loud he is. I have autism, severe anxiety, depression and agoraphobia. I told my husband's single female friend to back off. Husband says he hates our kids. Three years ago I confronted him about the number of messages that were coming through to him So far, he does not want to see me and says he hates talking to me. Second no matter what he says or how he feels in terms of how you "rate" (you shouldn't even dignify this) compared to his 1st, you can still consider him to be a shit husband and a lousy father. He is my first serious relationship so I’ve been learning a lot about how to be considerate of another person’s needs. They worked together for years, but at different sites. We had a heated conversation and my gut told me to read it so after he left for work, I did. You both have to be willing to fight for it not just you. Depending on where you live or the religion he was brought up in (if any) the social stigma of divorce might be enough to deter him from wanting one. He is practically on top of me. ' Everything was fine after that for couple of months. He has always and frequently told me I'm beautiful, and somehow sounded honest, without sounding like my mother - like someone without another option to answer. I have no idea if this is worth to post here but here we go. You need to tell him to mind his own business regarding your relationship with your mother. Keep your voice low and calm. Her parents have been divorced since she was 7. My husband of 6 years and I have been having a rough time for maybe 3 years now. Sounds like he's pissed off you kept a secret from him, especially considering you're about to be co-parents, if this is even true. My step-kids (21M, 16Fx3) hate Me (42F). He does not see the kids in the morning and only has a 2-3 hour window per day I’m back again. I'm convinced my husbands best friend hates me. He shrugs me off when I ask about his day. We have always been compatible and got along well most of the time. : r/Marriage. They have to be a perfect circle. When you have ODD, sometimes these impulses make you say things you don't really mean in your heart. . U ain’t ugly he is y. I'm sorry. My husband says he hates being in photos because his mom use to take lots of photos of him and his siblings as kids, but I think this is a shitty excuse. I stopped yelling at him. If not, that's ok too. Your marriage needs professional help and his unwillingness to go will lead to the demise of your relationship. When a husband is constantly critical, negative, or nagging towards you, it can be draining and damage your self-esteem. AITA for telling my husband he embarrassed me. She’s 15 almost 16. Exactly. Believing in God is no more magical than believing our universe spawned from nothing. I take pride in small accomplishments, but my dad had much My daughter hates me, loves her dad. You should've thought about that beforehand and that it's her choice. He promised me that we could have sex shortly after we got married. Note what it is you wanted to talk about and his response. I can’t stop thinking of it. Also this is long. He is a very moody person and has pretty bad OCD. The only reason you're being honest now is because you were forced to do so. I’ve been in the bath for a long time because I’ve been dreading going to bed with him. pk xe md fw kx pg po pc oq ew