Reddit i just found out my husband of 10 years never loved me. He said I ruined his relationship and future.

He had one failed marriage before me that he has seemingly refused to self reflect upon - she left him for the This news really broke me. I got this awful feeling in my gut. I keep waiting for the pain to end. No doubt I would be upset. It gets better little by little I recommend counseling for you and feel your feelings than let them go. A lot has gone down since I posted, and not much of it has been good to be honest. To all of those people out there saying ditch the kid. I have been with my husband since 1995. The man he had to have left him! Unfortunately, Karo hasn't received his end of the karma and is still just as fucking perfect as the day i found out he was having an affair with my husband. He and I decided before we even got married that we only ever envisioned us having 2 kids. I found out about it when I saw that my husband had another phone and confronted him about it. He wants me to tell her that he is not dangerous nor is he a About how he didn’t mean for things to end up this way, he’s sorry he hurt me, he does love me but he understands that I could never believe him because of what he’s put me through. All I can say is go with your gut. I realised my marriage of 10 years was him settling for second best. To make a long story long, on my wedding day I found out my long time friend’s husband cheated on her 3. My whole world is crashing right now. He did, a few times, tell her to not talk bad about me, but some of the things he lol’d and those made me cry. He raised that boy, he is his son. I'm ashamed to say I broke down in tears in front of my daughter. he sees ME as his father. That he was so obsessed and that he needed to move on. J30 · Original audio Just found out my husband cheated and I’m relieved. We share a mortgage, finances, cars, etc. Ive seen my sister in law on two occasions over the last 10 years. That I was never his first option. You are allowed the time you need to process and to prepare yourself for the inevitable end of this marriage. Just trying to work my way through this, so insight and advice are welcome. I seriously couldn't have been there more than 45 minutes, probably less. If he wasn't working or sleeping, he was with her. I never thought my ex would cheat, but he did. One good thing about what he did is me and my mum and siblings are so close now. I am confused and my eyes are all swollen up. I could write a novel, but I've been with my husband for ten years since I was 20 and he was 32. He was leading a full on double life where he would spend hours away from home and be with her, and come back and sleep at our house for a bit and then right back out. ADMIN MOD. I really wish I had kept it in for her sake, but I didn't. I have been with my husband Josh since we were seniors in high school. He's using this as power over you. I (27f) found out my husband (27m) was cheating on me 2 years ago while I was pregnant with our daughter. Sunday was my birthday and he drew me a picture of a rocket and told me he loved me to the moon and back. We’ve had a perfect marriage. This might be long. My husband forgot the past 8 years and wants a divorce Jan 28, 2023. My husband of 20+ years recently confessed that he had spent the night with our coworker when we were 2 months into our relationship. My husband was very excited, but I miscarried about 3 months in. I stalked my husband for two years before I formally met him. I honestly don’t think I got an exact due date, it was expected around mid-late January. I (24F) have been married to my husband (27M) for about 7 months now. Following this I asked my other children, except my youngest, to come and We’ve been married for 3 years and I only just found out recently that before we got married my husband ran a background check on me and my family. It feels like a devastation that I will not survive. We have now been married for the past four years. We have been fighting a lot lately, and I just felt like something was off. Let me tell you my story briefly: My ExH (together 10 years, married 8) cheated on me with a woman 10 years younger, too. " [r/relationship_advice] Interesting-Sock3794. However I'd be lying if i said I cared or had any ill will towards him. I just found out that my husband of 10 years has never loved me. I am still in shock. We recently had our 2nd child (5 month old f) and this time around we were not getting along. This hasn't worked in my favor when it comes to relationships. Ask your husband what he needs from you in order to forgive you and allow you to rebuild trust. It felt like falling in love again but with person that we are now, not the ones we met 10 years ago. We’re about to be moving houses and I was packing things away . Jul 4, 2023 · Don’t sell yourself short and remember the bad things about him too. Award. I guess he got tired of me being in a foul mood all the time because I've been single-handedly raising his teenage daughter (from a previous relationship). I’m unsure of how long it has been going on, but I know the last time they hooked up was only about a month ago. He’s kind, loving…. she later remarried, and when she went to divorce her second husband, found out she was still Jun 5, 2024 · We've had a few short, but devastating conversations since then. I didn’t know my husband in childhood at all, he moved to my state a few months before we got together. My husband was in a restaurant holding a woman's hand, I could only see her If he is looking at divorce from you, talk to him, if he is then you have a chance to stop it or seek help before things get further along. Original Post June 30, 2023. . We have also been together for 10 years, currently, and married for 8. I'm lost. Best wishes. It’s a long story but I (30F) let my husband (35M) stayed at his ex gf (33F) apartment. We broke up shortly after high school graduation but got back together a year afterwards. Your husband is being a wuss. It had always been just me and my best friend but when my husband came along we became an inseparable trio. Some-Movie. He travels for work a lot, and also meets a lot of women at these events. PerfectSherbet5771 My brother will never move out of my parents’ house and I seem to be the only one who sees why I 32[F] cheated on my boyfriend 39[M] five years ago. My husband eventually stopped being active on instagram and I thought it was normal because we were going through adversities uni yesterday when his brother shared my husbands stories of the night. " I'm 26 now and I've just learnt to live with it. I confronted him and told him that I needed to go through his Snapchat. Using a throwaway because my husband knows my Reddit account. Backstory: I was in my early 20s and a single mom. As stated in the title, recently my (29F) husband (31M) of 10 years let me know that he actually hasn’t loved me for the last 9 years of our marriage. My husband and I have been married for 8 years. Divorce him and become his new ex and he can tell his next wife that you were the love of his life. I went through his phone because I felt like something was going on. Yes, that is true. Advice. He was with her for 6 years. He let me borrow his laptop because I left BUT, when I have started talking with girls, if it at all seems like it may be more than a date or two, I tell them my living situation. The combination of finding out about my wife's infidelity and how upset I was making my daughter by how I was reacting. Keep in mind that although this was 10 years ago for him it was yesterday for you that you found out. This is entirely my fault and my mistake. Well, I get a message from a woman telling me my Husband Husband of 10 Years Abruptly Left. Specifically for the reason of what you are running into. If the answer is "nothing, the damage is done and is irreparable. Twighdark. My husband cheated on me over a year ago and I still just have never been the same. He was sincere and remorseful, but I realized that what I thought was love, was just an infatuation and the past week has shown me that. I [29F] cheated on my husband [35M] of 10 years, how to move on from here. I had the biggest crush on him but didn't want to ruin the friendship thing we had so I kept it to myself My husband (of less than a year) cheated on me after 13 years together. I chose to stay because I really like my life and he is great in all other ways. My son is 3 and really smart. I 27F and husband 28M have been together for over 10 years now and have two beautiful children together. edit someone mentioned I should put a trigger warning. Obviously I was heartbroken. My husband and I met when I was 18. I (31F) recently found out my husband (32M) has been sexting with and hooking up with another woman behind my back. I've been married to my husband for 3 years but had a relationship with him 2 years before our marriage. This happened last Tues. I didn’t know if he knew. Their emotional differences and experiences are too widely varied to really create an equally balanced relationship. See full list on marriage. If you're here, it's because you are surviving, or have survived, infidelity in a relationship that you thought was life-long. My husband and I have been together for nearly a decade now and have been married for just under one year. View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit [#88|+2557|537] I ( 43F) just found out my husband (48M) is leaving me after I give birth so he can " start fresh. Original posts by u/Throw-Away_familife n r/TrueOffMyChest. My entire life has been wasted. I found out my husband has fallen out of love with me. Feeling Sad. I found out because we were on vacation with his family and they were doing things I had no interest in participating in a few times so I stayed behind. Found out today that after 28 years, I'm completely disposable. 21 year olds should not date 16 year olds. Mood spoiler: distressing story to read. I ended up finding 2 girls names on his snapchat but the messages had already A few years after I left him and by accident I found out he had cheated I me with multiple women over the entire 10 years we were married. I found out years into our marriage that my husband is very messed up in the head. I also see divorce as a last resort. Me and my siblings are married, have kids, buying houses, doing well and he hasn't once reached out to any of us. 2. I (F32) just found out that my husband (M36) has a full blown secret family because his "other wive (F29) " just knocked on my door. My husband and I started dating. He’s the best man I know. Me and my husband dated when we were younger (twice, both times he left me, once because he cheated) then years later we decided to get back together but for reals this time. My husband Sam and I met after college at a book club. ( mods, I am happy to send my other account if needed, I just will not post it here. Your so-called “friend” is a rapist, and probably more women than just you if he had something on hand to slip in your drink. My wife Kelly and I have known each other for over 20 years and have been married for 18 years. The child was produced from a ONS and afterwards, my spouse did everything he could not to see his child. They were childhood friends before they started dating. The birth, no lie. MIL found out my husband got a vasectomy. He though is crushed, he had a breakdown on me crying, my husband went through 2 tours, went through years of ptsd, and this woman made my strong surviving husband cry. He was great when I was 20, but as I've grown and learned and worked on myself, he's stayed completely unchanging. He said I ruined his relationship and future. Our marriage has had plenty of ups & downs, especially during the recent few years. For me it was love at first sight. A week ago, I found out that my husband 38(m) has been cheating on me (39)F throughout our 11-year marriage. I am so heartbroken for him, but have so much rage towards her. I can only imagine the shock on his face when he figured out the girl he cheated on his After we got past hard times,We started a construction business together with over 10 employees for the past 10 years under my name because his credit was really bad, but he does most of the work and I mostly just fill out the loans and pay the bills. I never cheated. com I never see my boss anyway and she does't even know of my existence. I assumed he didn’t because he kept in touch. We have 3 children together ages 15, 13, and 10. Turned out that it was his spy phone. I feel so betrayed. The OP obviously is in a less than ideal marriage. Before. Just found out my wife cheated after 21 years of marriage, don't know what to do next. In the fall of last year, he had brought up a girl at work that had confessed that she was into him. I found out when I picked up the check from the sale of our house and the person who'd been in the negotiations gossiped. When I did I found that he had been speaking inappropriately with two women. My marriage was a huge lie and I’m ending it after 2 months. Married for 13 years. 5ish years ago. Remove yourself from the area, house, situation, immediately. He's not being honest about how he feels. Little backstory my husband and I met in Jr high, we have two kids and married for 11 years. I'm a little in shock. There is a lot more to this. Now I know why he never took me to a company party. We've been married 10 years, and have 3 children. I am deeply in love with my husband and I thought he loved me too. My husband passed away suddenly in August of 2020. I'm trying not to make excuses or put blame anywhere. Let me see how much I can compress all the info into something that makes sense. 3 days later via his phone and computer, I found out he had been having an affair. And OP's husband, i wish that you walk on Lego at least 10 times in the next couple of weeks (i want to insult you, but i wanna keep my karma - the real one, not my reddit karma ^^- so i'm just hoping that you step on lego, you get paper cut, you miss all your train, and when you'll finally settle with Karo, hope that Karo farts when you both " He doesnt love me. From my experience and what I have read here the sooner through the process you try and reconcile the more likely it will be to succeed. 5. I overheard Sam talking to his friend on FT when he thought I couldn't hear. I was even scared to go see one and pay for one but I found one that gave me a free consultation so he did not have to know. I found out last week that my husband never loved me. how can you all be so heartless. To make things worse! This girl he messaged had told him to leave her alone. He's had this apartment for two years. My mum wants me to stay with him and push it under What I found on fake profile: He poured his heart out on how much he loved this person for many years. We changed and it is beautiful. I (24F) married my husband (28M) about a year and a half ago. " Stop listening to this A-hole. he pays me 144k a year in which i use it to pay for my kid's expenses and have about 3-5k Not the exact thing at all, but somewhat similar & I was on the receiving end of the bad news- I found out, after 10 years of marriage that my husband hadn't slept with 5 women total, he had been in 5 long-term relationships, many other one-nighters, and in 3 of those ltr, the women were bisexual and open to bringing in different women for It’s common for women to blame themselves when they get raped because that’s what our sick society teaches us to think, but WHAT HAPPENED WAS NOT YOUR FAULT. ThrowRABlastDaPast. 1. And he walked downstairs. so, this happened with my husband's parents. Thank you to everyone who responded to my previous post. He always said it was “employees only”. Pfft, surgery. I am going to divorce my husband of 10 years. I am glad we did that because at the end of the 4 months, right before our annual fishing trip to France, I found out I was pregnant. It all begun last year. They did the Day. I just need to scream this into the void. That past action doesn't erase the wonderful marriage I've had for the last 12 years. I had been cheated on repeatedly by my baby's father, and I made it clear to ADMIN MOD. But 6 years. A few years ago I went through the same exact thing as you are going through right now, almost down to the letter. She is scared of him now and it is all my fault. Ignore them delete it. Take the phone with you and put it in a safe deposit box. Me (48m) and my wife (46f) have been married 21 years, together 23 years, and have a 22yo son. He had called me att least 50 times but my phone was on silent. The cheating consists of sexting with strangers on snapchat. This is beyond your skill level to figure out. You spent so much time reflecting on your behavior, but it’s time for you to examine his. We’ve been together for 2 years. And a traumatic birth with me almost loosing my life. If my husband told me he cheated on me at one point in our relationship 12 years ago. I don't, just my ex husband. We fell in love and married a year later right out of college. 5 years (yes I rushed into it my bad) We have a 14 month old son and it’s what’s been keeping me from divorcing him a long time ago (even tho honestly I’ve wanted to divorce him It makes me so happy to hear that he got what he deserved. Context he's a lovely husband and really looks after my son and provides everything for me. But honestly I felt like I've been stabbed especially after everything we went through to have this baby (ivf). You are going to have ask yourself some serious questions about what kind of person you are and what kind of person you want to be. Throughout our relationship during the early days we always had issues with him and how he treats other women. If he really never loved you, that’s his problem, and it shouldn’t be yours. After our 2nd baby was born She thanked me again. The first time I saw my husband I was a freshman in high school, he was a freshman in college. OOP has since deleted her account. When we met in 2014 I was working as a forensic psychologist and he was in the US Army (I'm from the UK). Don’t try to figure it out on your own. Sometimes even on trips when my husband isn’t on that trip. I assumed he didn’t because he kept in Aug 25, 2019. 3. We've been together for close to 8 years, and married for almost 2 years. RANT (╯° °）╯︵ ┻━┻ NO Advice Wanted. I’m just not made that way. I Just FOUND OUT that my HUSBAND of 10 Years Never LOVED ME #redditstories #reddit #redditstorytimes #redd #textingstories #fyp #texts #texting #foryou #reddit #rizz #redditstories. I was living with my now husband (44 years) and he was incredibly disgusted by the ongoing drama. I don't know what to do. After 18 years of marriage, I just found out that my children aren't mine. I just found out that my husband, who I loved, the one that I had to get over a ridiculous amount of deep seeded childhood trauma But because of past issues with his wife of 20 years we never talk about our relationships. We promised that this time was going to be real and no lies/unfaithfulness. You need a professional. My car my phone and even he has a person who he sometimes hire to follow me. I have always struggled with depression, and have been very overwhelmed with my life for the past year (we have no ADMIN MOD. I was a bit weirded out since he wrote her that the day after he broke up with the ex he was with for a long time. LOL Long story short, I sorta feel like something similar was going on. You have shown courage and self respect by leaving him, now work on healing and moving on. I dont think a counsuler can magically make him love me if he never loved me to begin with. Eight months ago my husband admitted to a PA that took place in 2013. Also, you both need to agree on whether what you did was cheating or not. I hadn’t worked for 12 years. Thank God. Guess how I found out… Fucking LinkedIn. Sorry if this sounds so vague and incomplete. This is all your fault. After 12 years of marriage, and 2 children together, I received a Facebook message yesterday from a woman who told me that she has a 15 year old daughter that my husband has continually denied since her birth. But this never constitutes cheating. You knew your husband wouldn't marry you if he knew how many men you'd been with, so you lied to manipulate him into a marriage. We've been together for a total of ten years. its all lies and slander". ** UPDATE: If your question has to do with my weight, I'll cover this here and if I am also 30 and my husband is 34. My husband doesn’t love his son any Less, and he still wants him every week. Going on 29 years. Welcome to Surviving Infidelity. I feel like I've wasted my life. My husband was acting strange; he deleted his facebook and then told me "If you get any strange messages. I never thought that this could happen to me. Regardless of your decision to stay in your relationship or to go, we are here to support you on your path to recovery Not just bank accounts but he will have to set you up with as much retirement account money as he set aside for himself. continued to coparent, remained very good friends. Your 10 year marriage is built on a pile of lies, and now that pile is starting to slip, and your marriage is coming crashing down. Now we have this beautiful 3 month old that was made with so much love. This is a support sub, a safe place to ask for advice and guidance. They have been married for 6 years together for 9 years. I just want out. When I got home, my husband was there. As far as I’m aware there has only been the one woman but I’m not entirely sure. > After our conversation last night he has suggested counseling to see if we can save our marriage. Anyway I decided to switch majors and took a shorter education. Find an MC and IC. He was on a dating app and went on a couple of dates with my now sister-in-law. Right now I’m feeling functional because I need to stay focused but I'm afraid I'll explode in a panic attack once this is over. I was kicked out of my mom’s by my stepdad after 2 years and I never really blamed them because I was just a burden. I honestly though that my life was a dream come true. I [25F] just found out I cheated a year ago on my SO [25M] of 3 years. Don’t force her to go. Or, was with him since 1995. I read their many many text messages and the mean comments she made about me. 4. I “got over” it relatively soon. Found out my husband of 20+ years cheated at beginning of our relationship. Please bear with me I don't really post anything on social media. for several months — but then without warning, he moved out of our apartment while I was at work one day, left a note that he was “done,” had an ilovepretzelday1. they married very young, divorced uncontested after a few years, his mom never got around to filing the paperwork but they both thought they were divorced. OP, you may want to take a closer look at your husband. Found out my husband cheated on me before we got married. I’m livid. " then you have to decide if you can live in a marriage under those circumstances. After that everything he did just started to annoy me he just stopped being attractive to me anymore. Trigger warning: talk of abuse and sexual assault, attempted suicide. My Husband Married Me For My Money. My husband always made it clear with me he wanted kids as young as possible, so he started his career and I quit my job when we were 20 and I got pregnant. When my husband had his done I went to the pharmacy to fill his pain and antibiotic prescriptions while the old snip snip was happening. We have been together for a total of six years. We have 17-year-old twins, a boy and a girl, and I found out that they aren’t mine 2 days ago. Based on Reddit advice, I tried to get evidence that he was with me for my money. There are good days and bad days. So basically I’ve been unhappy in this marriage for a while. She knew. ) He has been cheating on me since the year our child was born. Infidelity. Do these things to help reach a resolution one way or another. And you’re learning that now. Please no hateful comments or questions. He protects himself and his relationship by keeping it private. Be honest about his flaws. Only people who cared were my best friend and my husband. This could almost be my story. I (f39) come from an entrepreneurial family. He was stationed in Germany so it was normal that I didn't meet his family because they were back in the USA. I feel sick. If I ditch the kid there is a chance he may not even have a father in the future. Has never loved me. I found out that my husband and his ex gf shared a bed together. I'm posting here because I already tried talking to one of Or nit stalking, he has me tracked all the time. His friend was congratulating Sam on bagging me, because "I'm loaded". You will be okay and find someone that is not a lying cheat and you will look back and be glad you let him go. Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! Update: I (36F) found out that my husband (38M) has a Camilla (42F). We haven't slept together in 6 months because I feel so disgusted. We’ve been married 4 years now together 4. My husband is an extremely good looking man, and I We have owned our house for the four years we've been married. Update- I'm still living with my ex who got me a cruise for my bday. I'm no longer grieving his passing, the affair sucked the grief right out of me. We don't have kids together. His ex wife cheated on him as well but no one could ever hurt him the way I have. He was crying, calling me bitter and vindictive and pathetic. I keep waiting to still feel better, but still I wake up every morning with a heavy heart. I just found out my husband is a rapist. He was kind and silly and he made me feel loved. But I know given our marriage I would deal with and move past it. He is my first boyfriend and LTR, as well. I'm now 30 and he's 42. Back story: six years ago, my (33F) husband (33M) was struggling with loss of interest in activities, apathy, mood swings, irritability, etc. After my husband reluctantly admitted that we didn't meet on accident, I pushed and found out the reason he pursued me is that I'm "stable" and I would "do everything for him" and "never leave him. I 44f have been married to my husband was 17 years. Originally posted to r/offmychest. I'm still in disbelief. But then I finally understood where all his BS came from. Dec 14, 2023 · If you have just found out that your spouse cheated on you years ago, you're probably feeling upset and confused. Reconciliation almost never works. Date: May 01, 2022. Sorry this post may be a bit long. I don't know for how long, somewhere between 18 months and 3 years. I thought that I had a pretty happy marriage with "Jonas". AMA. I (32/F) found out my (32/M) husband has a illegitimate child. My husband is always confused at how we can talk for hours without getting personal but we do very easily. He walked downstairs to meet me at the pharmacy after he was done. I never knew he was capable of this ADMIN MOD. Today I found out my husband cheated on me. I will NEVER be anything with my ex-wife other than a coparent, but the new girl is a right to know. I'll never understand why or how he could be so callous but I've realised my life is better without him. Wow I am just sick and haven't slept in 3 days. Do what feels right for you. I only found out about it because the landlord couldn't reach him on his cell and called the landline He refuses to talk to me about it and says since he makes the money he doesn't need my input on all decisions. A rule of thumb for “the outer bounds of appropriateness” is the age of the older party divided in half plus seven. My husband has only had two sexual partners myself and his ex wife. vd gb qs pb jk yi hz vy os pa